Incredible Hulk

 I was talking to some very close work colleagues of mine the other day, and one of them mentioned that they had made The Incredible Hulk into a film. Without giving the plot away, plus I haven't seen the film, it's about a scientist who zaps himself with mad rays, and every time he gets upset he goes all green and big and tears his clothes with immense body strength. Inevitably at work, I steered the conversation round to me, about how I was so funny all the time and never lost my temper. Well fans, think on, I do lose my temper occasionally, but it usually ends up with a hilarious gag.
  One time right, I was walking along in Kwiksave, minding my own business doing my monkey walk - honestly if you saw it you would definately end up wetting your pants, I guarantee it - when an elderly lady tried to push past me, I nearly lost the plot, but fortunately Westlife came on through the piped music system and I calmed down. To be honest I cant remember which song it was, but I'll bet anyone any amount of money it wasn't that one they did with Mariah Carey.

 Just to show all my fans what I would look like as The Incredible Hulk, or The Incredible Marc as some of you are know doubt already calling me, I had a professional photo shoot set up. Picture the scene, me in the back yard topping up my tan, then a phone call from a close friend of mine saying they want to cancel a long standing social occasion - yes I know that would seem a ridiculous scenario, but it is supposed to be far fetched - and I go all green and angry, I've become INCREDIBLE MARC.
 Please note, unlike the Hulk on the film, I had the foresight to have a coat hanger ready so my casual wear didn't get creased. When will these filmakers ever learn.
 More next time on how you can win props from the set. I bet you are already wondering what I could be giving away, unless you have already looked at that page first.